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Happy Holiday Weekend to celebrate Memorial Day. This is typically the pre-summer kickoff to mark the official change in weather n the finale of the school semester for kids. Whether you're attending proms and graduations; May is coming to a close and pools opening this weekend basically tell me... AAAaaaaaAAAAaaaaaaHHHHHH **cue Summer time song** this is the season of grilling n giving the oven a rest cuz it's gonna be cold cuts for lunch affairs! I will be totally honest...Summer is NOT my favorite season. I canNOT stand heat + humidity yet I can appreciate the elongated hours of sunlight n as an early riser, I love sunrises. Its just anything above 85 turns me into the heat miser...grrRRRrrrr!! Becuz I am typically an INSIDE gal for the summer...my style doesn't change too much (remember, I wear flip flops all year round lol), I still grace the place with caftans prolly more times than not when its warmer but I don't partake in the wearing less as much so I don't care what the "summer body" looks like for me lol. One thing I do wanna challenge myself to do this season is wear white more. Fun Fack : Wearing all white just isn't my thing...dmn just like wearing all black I guess...but more so my reasoning is cuz I feel like it adds pounds to my appearance n the LAST thing I need is added weight (I meeeean I did just have a baby----SHET UP RICKEY)! I just don't think its flattering on me n I'd rather opt out the shade altogether. I am also too self-conscious wearing it cuz it'll be just my luck I'm clumsy on the day I'm wearing it. This outfit I'll call "Mixxy Couture" was the perfect balance since it was a mix of my evils. I didn't feel like I had to tip toe in the streets in fear of leprechaun vomit splashing on me (random-I know) n becuz it was just the top, it spared me from making me look pre-WLS days! I enjoyed wearing this becuz it was a casual look where the accessories n shoes changed the look. It's fun to see what a slight change can do for a look. If I want a more polished or #WerkCouture look, I'd go with the black crocodile clutch becuz its chic n looks like I mean business. Now if u wanna look more playful n "available" toss in a gorgeous POP of chartreuse which lays well against any black/white combo. This clutch is by MZ Wallace n sold out but don't fret....I got a backup here by House of Want (which is an affordable brand). I always feel like adding red is too predictable with black n white so dazzle em with GOTCHA BYTCH n amp the style up with this shade. Deets of the Mixxy Couture Top: River Island (Size L) Belt: New York & Company (Size L) Jeans: CLEARANCE on u heaux via Target (Size 14) Clutch: Amazon Shoes: Sooo last year when I caught a Nordies Sale After playing blogger n being a one man band...I definitely swapped for the "dad shoes" by Nike. These were found in a random clearance section somewhere during the pandemic n they definitely get worn even in the winter time haha. Perfect for pedi runs but yea...these are comfy n its the grand finale look of the post. This what I would need to have on when I'm chasing my Terror Tot around the playground lol. I am all for stretching a look n one outfit...3 pairs of shoes...4 bags wasn't too bad-now THIS is what I call a good example of "cost per wear" becuz u will see me in this multiple times **cue evil laugh** What do you typically pair your black n white combo's with? U stick to the basics or living on the edge with a pop of color to compliment the color block? Let me know n feel free to tag me :)

So last weekend...I did a thing. I had the pleasure of attending a social mixer called Rant 'N' Mingle by Bolade Ola-Ojo n I must say...it was pretty fun! Yall know I am a homebody-nonetheless, I had a really great time being out pass my bed time and kicking it with really great friends. I said...ooooh I'm really outchea being a socialite haha. The opportunity to co-host the event came from a young lady I met at a meetup months prior. We were just chatting it up and before we departed; exchanged info after I told her I'm a blogger. Never not promote urself n show up as ur best self at all times cuz ya never know who you'll bump into. Little did I know Chidera of Tek Remedy would be hitting me up cuz she thought of meeeeee to be a good fit for this event. I had no clue what to expect. I will definitely say Chidera n her team kept us up to date leading up to the event n maintained professionalism throughout. I appreciate how detailed yet straight to the point the emails were too. I spoke to Bolade beforehand like hey...what do u need from ME n how can I be of service. He answered with showing up n being myself. Oh wooooord? Bet. That's easy...I can do that lol. Now I have more of a reason to do it-sure! I wasn't quite sure how to approach the attire. I always consider the time of the event, location, envision the crowd, my mood n more importantly...what story do I wanna tell with my outfit. I wanted to go with some Cruella Couture: Dress : This B/W flowy halter neck was picked becuz the color block design is always a good alter ego type affair. When I don't wanna wear ALL black, I opt for this! Shoes: I honestly forgot I had these (smh), I got em during the early pandemic from Nordies becuz anything polka dot gets me (Topshop) Bag: Yall know I love quirky bags, this one is by Danielle Nicole Fascinator: I looooove a good fascinator n even better when it's vintage! This one is from **click the fascinator title** which I had a great time shopping at. These head toppers are sure ways to zooosh up an outfit to the next level. I didn't want this post to be hella long...I also am juggling being in the office more than not so trying to balance work n the pleasure of blogging seems to get defeated with time these days cuz I do need to sneak in resting my eyes haha. I will spill all the deets within the next post **cue evil laugh** but definitely wanted to let the beat build...

If ever u truly know me, u know my greatest pleasures to keep me sane is my weekend strolls to Starbucks. It brings me joy to get up fresh n early to start my day with fresh air n people watching. Curling up on a lawn chair to play catch up on social media n what not, then headed to whatever the next spot shall be; Wegmans, Target...Nordies! Becuz I'm known for dramatic flare, there's no surprise that iiiiiii would be the one to come across #coffeesleeves becuz I mean...who doesn't love a good EXTRAness n given I be snapping pics anyways...it's just right on brand. If you're like me, u exercise ur creative brain and have all these grand ideas. It would be lovely if only...u could execute! I have come to the conclusion that while I make no mistakes on how I procrastinate, I've also recognized...I am NOT a business woman, boss bytch...entrepre-nothing! I have no motivation or ambition to be in that running a business space-it's just not me. I love to support those to take the leap-iiii am just not one of them. Years ago, I had the idea and concept of #BaeBags which I still loosely do for friends n fam. It's nothing I advertise becuz I like to maintain the pleasure of it not feeling like work. When I came across these coffee sleeves, my mind got the racing n I went into boss mode with grand ideas n how I wanted to market my sleeves. Do I call em "Coffee Couture Cuffs", "Couture Coffee Sleeves" "Coffee Cuffs"...I don't know. Where do I place my logo? Oh shyt...I need a another logo? How do I find a manufacturer? How long is it gonna take? How much should I order? How do I price em? Do I create a store ON my blog or separate? Let's be honest here...I've just never been a salesperson! Everybody ain't meant to be a boss n that's ok. If everyone were the entrepreneur's where would that leave consumers? It takes a full team and production to pull off the moves small business owners do and I just wanna admire from afar and closely by supporting with my dollars. Self-awareness is sexy and I am very aware of my lane...influence!! I am the perfect print model. I am the perfect billboard to advertise and even better to partner with to show off ur goods. I can see it now: Kisha of BB x Nordstrom n Balls of Beauty x **insert other brands to have collections** That is where I am these days. Back to these Coffee Couture Sleeves ...these are for dramatic effects only. They are not meant to think u can slide a sleeve on n carry it like a tote or walk around letting it dangle like a purse. It's not stable enuff for that. It's merely for the lewk of it all. I grabbed this set cuz the chain is interchangeable n it was basic enuff for me to get feel of what I (thought) I'd market as far as color n shape. I truly admire the leaps of faith n sacrifices small black business owners do from the conception of the idea and the hard work that goes into making it come to fruition. I unfortunately missed out on those genes in the line for God's work lol. If ever you need a model for your goods...u know where to find me!! I'll be dropping links for yall to enjoy n partake in when I find dope shyt yall should be aware of-please and thank you :)

This week has been a whirlwind. I honestly had no desire to post this week despite my own challenge to post twice a week #Fail and we are well into early May. I would like to have an honest moment...if you've read my recent post you'd understand why! Well...I have been deliberating to see which direction I wanna shift n how to get there while still maintaining my own integrity n staying true to self. I've been on a social media hiatus but also hosting my parents visit and going INTO the office more times than not-ya girl be TIED!! Well as the week was coming to an end; apparently the life of a legend was too. Yall are well aware of my love for THE Kevin Samuels. So much so that I received many calls of condolences as if I knew the man personally lol. I do NOT know him but I do appreciate when yall check on me when something happens to my faves. I was totally crushed and affected when Omar (Michael K. Williams) died-that hurt me. As much as I joked about the everlasting life Cicely Tyson had, I paused at her death. There's just a piece of my heart that cracks for celebs when they die as if we knew each other in spirit. I didn't wanna believe the news n was hoping it was a Sinbad hoax. I slept on it n woke up where I still didn't wanna concede to the news but later in the morning when I seen a trusted friend post-I knew! As controversial as Kevin was, it was always interesting to me how people focused more on the man than the message. There became such a divide amongst the pro-kev n anti-sams where the mere mention of his name initiated disgust n snarls lol. If the shoe fits...wear em well n if it don't apply, let it fly! I don't need to go into a full dissertation on how a stranger sparked a conversation n inspired folks to level up. I've grown up around n have plenty of Kevin's to whom I appreciate cuz it's the uncut no fluff truth we women should LISTEN to and gain a greater understanding to the wiring n nature of male species. Whether u like sugar (Steve Harvey) in ur medicine or take a straight shot; once u learn the lingo, life will get easier. As I am slightly in mourning yet understanding to God's timing, I became perplexed by some of the reactions to this man's untimely death. The rejoicing of a man's death has been utterly disgusting. Not even Hitler nor the cruelest racist has been celebrated in such a manner. I have never nor would never be excited with a "die ngga die"mentality whether I liked someone or not. I have no hate in my heart for such an act. For so many women who complained about "tone n delivery" I find it odd these same critics can spew such disdain or let someone affect them so much they clap at the news of his passing. What happened to the Bible thumping Christians? In a world where humanity needs kindness more than ever, the things I've seen is sad. Like WTF!! Remove ur feelings n strip him to a person and you'd realize someone lost their father...a mother lost her son...a host of others lost a mentor, confidant, colleague n meant something to them. If nothing else, the reactions proves his point with how folks reveal themselves. The hate based on a short clip or click bait should be studied in psychology classes. If you've ever watched full content, u could get a better understanding of reactions or context of the message. While folks loved to focus on the shocker effect, nobody seemed to acknowledge or make viral the moments where he'd recognize the need for mental health specialist to step in n cut the convo short so it wouldn't become a mockery. The times folks used his platform as a couch n shared heavy shyt that he showed compassion for; the many thank u's n u saved my love life convo's and the empathy he showed to broken women. He didn't discriminate cuz he let the men have it too. A lot of folks won't get it now n hopefully the lightbulb clicks later. Heaux won't admit it yet a lot of chicks he described we can all resonate or know someone that fits the shoe. Maybe that's the part that upsets us so much. Looking in the mirror can be ugly. I often enjoyed listening to the banter in convo's with the back n forth after a hot topic popped up. It was either "he's disrespectful to black women" or "I meeeean he got a point". Nonetheless, the conversation started n impact was made...so much so even in death he's still a hot topic. As an observant one, many need to check their hearts ( ode to Carla ) becuz we've lost a sense of moral n the hypocrisy is quite evident when we preach about not judging n plea for forgiveness n grace. Guess what tho...everybody gets a turn!! I know one thing...yall bytchez bet not do me like that cuz I call yall heaux out. It's bad enuff heaux be hating cuz the fellas wanna protect me at all costs lol. I am appreciative of the gesture! While heaux still trying to figure out "where are the good men", I am seeing them everywhere n engaging quite often-it's like being apart of a secret society haha. I can confidently leave out the house with no wallet n know I'll be provided for by strangers. I have a better relationship with the men in my life (including my dad) becuz I've grown in communicating better n not just listening but applying the knowledge effectively. I've stepped my game up in my own presentation n confidently walk with my head high. I am getting the results I dreamed of-slowly but surely by becoming the best version of myself everyday. My overall attitude n mindset helps with how I receive people. I see the separation happening n sadly...folks getting left behind. We need not focus on the critics n detractors who are feeling relieved n throwing death parties becuz in the end....their destiny is solidified cuz with or without Kevin...them lonely 4 walls getting tighter n tighter as they grow older. The dogs hind legs just sliding n gliding slowly to its own death n they look around or even look back to reflect on life only to say...dmn maybe he was right. Love em or hate em, that man went out in a way other guys dream of n he's my kinda petty cuz for his grand finale he practiced what he preached lol. He did what many will not be able to do in such a short amount of time. I admire the work ethic n the elevation of the crown. The last laugh of it all is the fact that he did NOT die alone. If only heaux could take that same energy of being broken birds n ensure themselves the same fate; they could go out with an exclamation on their life span instead of a sad n dull period. Wheeew...cold world!

Entering into this blogging space, I knew there would be politics u have to acknowledge n learn how freedom of speech ain't free. I do not like disclaimers n being censored-it's the Aquarian in me! I have an appreciation for creativity and understand the language of those misunderstood. However, u can't expect everyone to see the world as u do n for that-I am gonna keep it cute on mute moving forward. For the sake of progressing in a way I'd like myself and my blog to go...I clearly have to curve some thaaaangs in a manner that keeps a general message across the board without losing my sense of ME. I totally get why Beyonce doesn't do interviews n she doesn't speak much. I also loved how models back in the day only spoke with their sense of style n runway walk. I warn yall I am not politically correct n it's hard for me to articulate when I do talk becuz it's hard for me to have a filter. When people invite to their podcasts, I am hesitant. I do not speak the norm n we are in an era where everyone is easily offended, looking to be offended or offended to be offended; its as if u walk on eggshells. I do not want my words n actions to be taken out of context n I value YOU for taking the time to follow, like, share n kiki w/me in the DM's. I appreciate fostering relationships outside of social worlds to show more than a 30 sec glimpse of a click. I fancy my friends from day one's to fresh one's which means I am not above a tug on the coat tails to reel me back in becuz I stand by it taking a village. If there's one trait I know I have is a sense of humility n I can also be accountable for my actions. With that being said...I had feedback from a person who was dear to me n it made me pause. I paused so much that I used a life line for a 2nd opinion who helped me view it on a devils advocate side. I pretty much blurred the lines to merge my personal n blogging space whereas they should definitely be separate. As it relates to myself, my algorithms have changed becuz I don't keep up wit the trash tv or ratchet accts where I gain no value. It's made a world a difference for me. Its like glasses have been cleaned n I can clearly see shyt for what it is. I can respect everyone's opinions n see the good in everybody's walks of life. No matter how different we are, we end up full circle as the same. Becuz I do love to laugh n often joke, newbies who peek in are unaware to the shenanigans! I am not looking to be no shock jock, mean girl nor Judge Judy. I could care less what store ur dollar takes u to n YES bonnets in public make me cringe. Do I need to say it out loud? Nope! My unpopular opinions aren't meant to talk down on nobody n I have no problem apologizing if it makes someone feel some kind of way. It should matter how someone makes u feel. Lisseeeeeen...I like my karma clean n the ability to be good in any hood. I can't grow if I don't know so I would appreciate feedback n comments left in the box outside my door. I want my brand to continue being the inspiration, motivation n elevation needed in the community. I'll just revamp the way I deliver the message to be well-received by the masses becuz u never know who's watching. I can also say...I am not for everyone cuz u can't please em all-that is okaaaaaay! I've been doin something right to where I get invited into VIP spaces n hosting events-let's keep the party goin! For professional purposes just note silence can't be misquoted.

I didn't realize April is bout DONE!! I had no plans scheduled this weekend n listened to my body n napped as needed after the purge continues lol. I know it feels old lady like to have such a typical weekend routine but it keeps me vibrant n glowing. I know the pandemic is "over" and the weather is breaking but I just don't have a need to be on the scene like that. Now for those new here...EVERY Saturday, I make my way to Starbucks by 0730a. I know-it's early n my body clock drastically changed after my last hoorah aka My Lil Toot so it stuck. After people watching n catching up on IG, I'll head to Wegmans, Target n Nordies; even if its just to window shop, I get my fix. I make a few rounds of catch up wit my friends to check in via FaceTime/phone calls n sit in stillness. I don't always need something to do n I enjoy a bunch of nothings lol. With the inflation n gas cost...I'm doin my own lock down here n there. Apart of sitting in stillness, I feel a shift happening. Where n how, I don't know but we are in a season of phkn weirdos. BOLO (be on lookout) SEASON: What I mean about weirdos is being able to listen to ur intuition when people approach u and paying attention to intentions. I think a lot of times, there are guys who get infatuated by the presence I have online. They may have a perception of my lifestyle n becuz I don't move nor have the aesthetics of the typical chick u see online they wanna shoot their shot. In my last post, Power of NO ; I mentioned when guys reach out I expect them to have some type of purpose n value to be added to the team. I am not looking for new friends n I am aware the confidence n vibrant energy I have will attract any n everyone. I have no complaints on the dating field these days becuz what I present doesn't attract bum dudes n there's no shortage of approaches from men. The chicks I see who still complain about piss in the pool are the main ones who haven't done or completed the work n healing. The unfortunate thing for me is...I've been coming across a lot of great guys with no kids n I have to toss em back so they can be great elsewhere. I don't want them waking up resenting me later for not giving them their own kids n I AM DONE!! Back to the shift happening n weirdos **cue freaks come out at night song** New levels, new devils right? or whatever the saying goes lol. The discernment I have is high n I am guarded but not Ft. Knox guarded. I'll give some room for the potential to show me something n within a few convo's I can already tell how far it will go. Women will say men are intimidated by us n I don't think that's the case. I think there's a certain angle guys have to learn to approach with when they recognize the typical "what's ur favorite color" doesn't work on chicks like me. There's nothing much a guy can do to impress me! So what can a guy do to get my attention? Little do they know...I respect a guy just being himself. No gimmicks-No fluff-No game. Just their authentic self. I can always tell when a guy is trying too hard or shaping an answer into what they think I wanna hear. They peep my style, how I talk, my kindness n enjoy my smile with my humor not recognizing I am deeper than that. I was called a "conversational lush" which tickles me pink becuz I do love a great convo of shyt beyond the stars. When a dude speaks of anything sexually early, I write em off. If the attraction is there n we already flirting...don't drop no dk pics n make sexual innuendos **eyeroll** like bruuuuh, how old are weeeeee, smh. Guys will always weed themselves out early if u pause n pay attention. We tend to overlook red flags cuz we infatuated with the idea of can this be the one...I hope he's the one...gawd please be the one cuz u tired of being out in deez streets starting from ground zero. This is why it's important to have a LIFE or some business (as Rickey tells me) outside of. U won't even notice the lack cuz u too busy! Just be careful out here. People will peep the flourishment n thrive-ation n they want IN on the action. Bytchez will try to attach themselves to u in order to "single black female" u not realizing u can't steal yo mama's recipe **Kwame Brown voice** n Fellaz will try to infiltrate becuz they are captivated n look at u as a challenge. Stop em early! Pay attention to their attitude n mindset as it relates to relationships cuz its some bitter n broken birds tainting the pool too. Do not entertain n it's ok to be honest n direct. I've been getting really good at my communication skills opposite of my typical non-verbal lol. I will tell a guy in a minute...this ain't what chew won't so Gawn GIT!! We have no time to waste these days. I wanna preserve my energy to someone deserving not perfect. I am in no rush to get down the aisle n enjoying life at my leisure so when someone does come along who is ready to get down the yellow brick road in bliss they'll be no mistake that it just feels right. It's the balance of it all for me n this is why I enjoy my weekend routines to self cuz it gives me a chance to stop n smell the roses which allows me to make better judgement with a clear heart-no clutter!

Being single for a long time has given me a sense of power becuz I've sat my azz down and evaluated my likes n dislikes. I have analyzed the stats of what is out here on display n peeped the market price of what these heaux is serving to re-brand n renew myself to the woman u see before u today. My growth has brought me to a place where I am always in the season to flourish + thrive becuz I don't wanna slip back to the place where I didn't think highly of myself. When u do the "werk" n healing these heaux claim to do, on the other side of it u gain an appreciation of what you'll understand and that there's a balance to life. There are sacrifices of shyt u got to give up in order to operate on higher levels. The word-NO ain't one of em in order to accommodate getting to ur best self. I have seen too many unfortunate situations of stress coming from people who don't know how to exercise their rights to NO. There's an epidemic sweeping across the young generations called entitlement n those who fall victim of saying yes when it should be no are suffering. My daddy always saaaaid "nobody owes u shyt" and I stand on that becuz there's no need to internalize when someone tells us NO-majority of the time it ain't about u. There is no success without sacrifice. If you succeed without sacrifice it is because someone has suffered before you. If you sacrifice without success it is because someone will succeed after. -Adoniram Judson Why am setting yall up wit the importance of sayin no? After figuring out who I am, I am not compromising the woman I've become for the likes of those who do not deserve me. I am happy where I am now in life and I would love to bring in a plus one who'll be a great addition to the life I've created. New levels bring new devils n this why it's important to have discernment becuz u will notice an influx in folks who are attracted to ur light. Don't waste ur time adding new people into ur life who won't serve good intentions. Some people will circle the block (as the kids say lol) becuz they want some type of closure. I had someone inbox me asking for a "do over" becuz he didn't feel like he gave me a fair chance-TUH!! I ain't even the same Kisha from 6 months ago, let alone anything over 3 yrs. We hold on to such a need to know WHY n I've learned the closure comes from our side-not theirs. I have honed my gift to spot bshyt early on in a person. I can tell how someone approaches me n engages what they looking for n what they think they gonna get wit me. Folks will fall in love with the fantasy of u online or how they peep u from afar. When they go in for the kill, I block that shyt that Mutombo. The freedom in saying NO feels phkn fab. I am not lonely nor desperate. I'm the most busiest non-busy chick becuz I'm just out here enjoying life at my leisure. Folks think I wake up to a whole line of "good morning" txts or have an array of dates lined up n I don't. I be chillin cuz I hand out a lot of NO's. I don't 2nd guess my gut instincts n give benefits of the doubt anymore. This is all apart of moving with intentions. There are chicks who will envy u and guys who wanna conquer becuz they recognize u are sunshine. They wanna get next to u n ride ur coat tails to see how far you'll let them ride. Be careful. Saying no will save u disappointment n I go off instincts. Folks will try to be adamant on using angles to get next to u, yall know its getting warming up n the vultures are swarming around the pool. I don't accept a bunch of "wyd"-ers. Nah...when u dip into my DM's u better have a point-purpose n value to present; almost along the lines of the 5 W's lol. Teach a man to honor u by the respect u have for urself -RC Blakes Stand tall n strong in ur NO cuz folks out here trying to get over by any means necessary. It takes more courage to say it than not becuz it's not well received. I've said no to things when the flesh was weak n said no to uncertainty cuz I needed to pick a side. There's such a reward when u manage ur priorities and set those boundaries to protect urself. No is self-care and these days for me, the power of NO is a peace of mind.

So you wanna be a blogger...what u wanna talk about? how do u get started? what do I post? how do I post? when do I post? These are typical questions we ask ourselves when we enter into the content creator world. It can be intimidating and scary becuz there's an idea of what u think it is vs the reality of what it actual is. Once you navigate the initial jitters and find ur niche u will start to make connections that'll reveal the path ur meant to head towards. It can be overwhelming to feel the pressures to keep up with the hottest trends of what ur counterparts are doing or clock the numbers of followers/likes becuz u feel a certain validation to the platform u share urself with to the world. As an small-nano-micro influencer who's literally started from the bottom; I can only give the words of advice as I've learned from experience... Show up as urself and stay true to YOU! Initially you feel discouraged if u don't receive the anticipated results of blogging but it's important to remember ur WHY n focus on the intent. Everything else falls into place as they may. Within the last few years I really started taking blogging seriously n promised myself to stay consistent. Once I started focusing on my purpose, the opportunities started rolling in and I was able to find like-minded bloggers who've become friends beyond the screen. You can't please everyone n I don't care to convert folks who can't relate or don't wanna operate in greatness. It feels good being able to attend events and engage online with people who can go off the genuine vibes I display. Learning the politics of blogging has been interesting as u balance the good from the bad. One thing u must learn is the art of networking. We all need each other in some capacity n the building of a team is vital. Over the pandemic time, I started discovering new shows on YouTube n Lapeef Let's Talk was one of them. I also took to Anton while on the show n started listening to his Millionaire Morning Show which was inspiring. It was a breath of fresh air to nod in agreement so much to someone who was moving in the direction that I am looking to move in. He lives in Detroit and mentioned a visit to DC where he'd have a meetup. I kept up with the deets n showed up-as myself...being myself. The crowd was "super dope" n during meetups u mingle n chat it up with personalities that match n compliment yours. Nothing is forced when ur operating in the essence of urself-everything just flows. My attendance to this meetup led to talking to someone who admired my style n by the end of the convo an exchange of information becuz she felt I'd be a good fit for future opportunities. Ta Daaaaaa!!!! Can u believe it? Meeeee....Lil ol' meeeeee **gasp** who would've thunk it. I am so proud to present an event I was invited to be apart of next month for the Rant n Mingle . As a little gift for you, you can use my discount code: @ballsofbeautyblog for 10% off ticket price and I'd love to see u guys there :) I just wanted to make a quick testament to those who might be in this weird space of content creations who feel they need to have 100k followers, Steven Spielberg directed videos n reels or Mr. Blanks behind the camera to shoot u on a fancy location styled n posed by Tyra Banks. Don't let these #LuxuryUnboxings fool u to believe u gotta strive to that level to be apart of the cool kids club. I don't go seeking opportunities, they find me becuz I'm able to curate, cultivate and create my blogging space authentic to just being me. I don't stress over the numbers to be seen becuz I love a good marinade. Toss it out there being imperfectly perfect n stop overthinking it. Just execute! If u wait for the "perfect time" you'll look up n seeing someone else snatch ur idea n run with it. I am still learning on the fly n it feels good I have blogger friends to rely on who assist me as needed. Friendships are important. Fostering relationships make a difference becuz we all need each other. There's no way we can do this alone! Find ur tribe, share ur vibe n enjoy the ride!!

Aside from learning from my elders and mistakes of others-I am totally winging it at adulting and I've made some pretty jacked up azz decisions along the way. I know we live with the "never let em see u sweat" adage but I mean...that's why we've been so conditioned to this hustle n grind mentality where we only see the celebration of the aftermath. Growing up our parents put such a pressure of perfection on us n in typical child-like fashion; we don't wanna let em down. It's easy for parents to say "live for u" but we keep this notion of I don't wanna disappoint them so we strive to live up to their expectations. My dad would always stress n press the importance of going to college after HS. We would ride into neighborhoods of mansions with the speech of "this can all be urs IF..." and no matter how often it was beat into my head to go to college, it was never something I was press to do. Now granted I definitely wanted to go to Hilman; still I don't like the pressures we put on our kids to make these lifelong choices in the matter of freshly graduating high school. Like dmnnnn I'm getting tossed into the real world...let me digest a dose at a time at my own pace. There are some people who have that high ambition where they know, no matter what THIS is what I wanna do n nothing can stop them. Errr uuuh-I'm not that one. I would get compared to my strongly academically higher achieving brother (currently within arms reach of his doctorate) or be nudged into the idea of playing basketball becuz I have the height. Like...really!! Me? Basketball? TUH!! My layups ain't on them type of courts n I'm not meant to slam dunk them kinda balls. I do not regret being a free bird. I have the balls to take chances outside of the norm n go beyond what is familiar. Being able to learn from trials n tribulation is the freedom to fail becuz u come back resilient and u discover ur own endurance. I can pretty much attest to going rogue with what I should do, suppose to do n expected to do based on prior parenting n such. I don't do that whole looking back to see what I'd do differently-NOTHING! I also don't sit back n ponder on the idea of the ones who got away. I am exactly where I am suppose to be in whatever season I'm in. I think there's some value in failures n reminds us we are human. I am loving my journey of imperfection n being open to the ideas of unlearning and relearning with diversity added. So don't get in a slump becuz ur not "where u wanna be"or feel like ur behind cuz u missed the mark at certain points in ur life. I am still struggling with learning French-nevermind me only practicing for 30 min every 2 days lol. There's always room to re-evaluate n regroup; that's the beauty in the freedom to fail cuz not everyone gets a hole in one!

I've never had a man ask me what I bring to the table. I would be offended actually if he did but it would also reveal I am not on my game n I'd question my energy I'm putting out since it precedes me. The problem I see during these conversations is we tend to rattle off what we do: cook, clean and **cue other domestics n sexual abilities** which totally mean nothing to a grown man. Scrap that shyt. U clearly ain't spending ur monies on em anyways so ur degree n job doesn't help them. Yall aint given these dudes no random "Bae Bags" for just thinkin of em n Father's Day ain't til June so don't lie as if u treating em to anything outside the ordinary. A woman who wants for nothing gets everything -April Mason Define urself by who u are n not by ur accomplishments. When I meet someone n have an intro convo, by the end they don't know where I work, what I do n nothing of an educational background becuz it's nothing I lead with. What money can't buy is my youthful-ness n fluidity to be a peaceful place. I maintain a pleasurable life and have a passion with bloggin so I'm a good dmn time to myself and with myself. When u have ur own life and adventures, it's alluring to them. You need to come in their life n amplify what they got. Your companionship and intellect inspires them n they'll be putty in ur hands. How u make em feel with ur presence makes the difference to separate u from the pack. I see a lot of yall are socially akward or don't know how to allow a convo to flow. Often times they just need u to be a listening ear. I'm easy to talk to cuz this is a no judgement zone n I love a deep convo. Just be YOU!! The Art of knowing what it is to BE a woman and not what we DO as women will propel u to attract who ur lookin for. Make urself what ur tryin to attract n stop trying to make these clowns u entertaining something they not. We have no time to waste no' mo'. Be open to receiving ur blessings! Yes u can do it urself-esp if u've been single for so long but I tell yall all the time...I'm a damsel in distress when men are in my vicinity; I love to hear "let me get that for u" oh hell yea u can. Learn the flow laydeez n the chatter of table tawk needs no response becuz the question answers itself by how u show up.

Where for art thou Spring? Surely as April arrives so should Spring right? It's like Winter is lingering like patrons at a club let out n I am getting annoyed. Just when I was ready to put my sweaters and scarves up after being teased with 70 degrees; I dmn near wanna put my Xmas tree back up. Good thing the Easter Bunny got fur... I have begun my lifelong journey of purging haha but with Spring here I definitely needed to initiate cleaning. About every 5 years our style should change or do an overhaul. As I'm getting older my style is slowing down to not stuffing myself into too small clothes and going for what FITS my body in the now. I tossed clothes that I gave up on fitting again whether they had tags or not. One thing bout me is...u gotta strike me while the iron is hot. Not only am I looking to reset my closet, I need to reset my body! I've been resetting my mind with switching my algorithms up n removing the ingestion of bshyt n slowly but surely learning some French (which I listen to on repeat 30 min at a time) which has done wonders in maintaining a great attitude n outlook on life. When I wake up, I listen to smooth jazz as I get ready in the morning and my 90's R&B playlist as I do my floral arrangements n literally stop to smell the roses! In a recent post: The Art of Easy Living I leave some #LifeHax on ways to woosah when life seems to be stressful. This month I look forward to spending time with friends on the weekends and do what I dropped the ball on last month-fasting! I gotta do a solid 7 day fasting from SOMETHING becuz I feel like it does give some form of clarity when u exercise a discipline in fasting. I gotta really hone in on what direction I wanna take my blogging n steps to take n making it happen. I don't have writers block, it's really just taking the time to create I am struggling to juggle n also learning at the same time with these videos. I am aware I am not operating at my fully capacity as it relates to sharing my art with the masses n I need to figure out a way to EXECUTE. Too many times we talk ourselves out of doin by coming up wit a million excuses except for-just doing it. So here I go taking a leap into April...I'm gonna build it as I fly.

For some strange reason, folks think it takes a lot to do a lot n that is a myth. These days, I like my life to be smooth sailing as possible n on my lazy days-it's caftans! Caftans are no brainers. U can dress em up or down n u will still look put together (which don't take much now given **looks around** what folks leave lookin like). My new rule for when I start traveling again will be carry on ONLY n tossing caftans in the bag save time from thinking. Who wants to think hard on vacay!! The only downfall to caftans is...I can't fully enjoy em in the winter lol. These are like #adultonesies n top tier for loungewear cuz they are great transitional pieces. Wearing these whether around the house, grabbing mail or running errands feel so regal. The way the wind blows makes u appear as if ur gliding around the streets. Today's vintage balls post is a flashback from 2018 when I became woke n discovered what would become apart of my lifestyle n shhhhhurprisingly (and secretly) maternity couture. Life Hack: Caftans Becuz I mainly stay in caftans in warm months, I can totally purge a lot from my closet. My style has drastically changed n I can't see myself goin back. I gotta create some space n remove unnecessary-ness as it relates to garments per wear. I don't splurge on these (at the moment). My caftans come from vintage shopping, eBay and Amazon. Like these... Feel free to click the links and grab some for #WerkCouture cuz I sure nuff will feel like I'm goin to the beach as I arrive to work or headed to the beach AFTER work which just maybe a Happy Hour near u **clink**